Sarah Janene Sneider

Are You Caught in the Triangle?

Rescuer, Victim, Persecutor
is a Common Triangle in Relating
Learning to love in a relationship is 24 hours a day - 7 days a week for a lifetime challenge.
These are the Universal questions we must address in our relationships.

Do I Love my Self?
Do I Trust Love? Or is it dangerous?
Do I believe I am Lovable?
Do I deserve to love and be loved?
Do you Know How?
Concretely?
Do you See with an open heart?
Do you Hear with an open mind?
Do you Speak with, as a loving supporter of,
the other in the relationship?
Do you Stay within yourSelf when you Relate?
If the answer is not a firm, solid Yes to each of these questions, then:
You will no doubt be caught in the Adler Triangle:

I Am the Victim in many circumstances.
I Was just trying to Help this person I love
Rescuing them for their learning NEVER works.

You Can Not Help Another Learn
their Lessons or Fix their Problems.
You Can Not Fix A Problem You Do Not Have
without entering the Triangle:
So - 
Soon the other person will view you as the Persecutor as you are attempting to help them.
They are your Victim because you have not stayed within yourSelf and you are attempting to Rescue
them from the Mistake you know they are making
because you have already learned
Not to Do what they are now Doing.
When You assume any of these roles in a relationship, you will have to experience all three before the Cycle is complete.
Loving Them Means Trusting that They and They Alone can Learn - Their Way Not Yours.

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